HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAHVEED!

This year, he got a fashion sense for his birthday. Oh no, wait...
Well, there's always xmas. And he does still look good, if you ignore the branding of the crotch.

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All hail the idiot football fans...

The gems of wisdom are right this way...

"villa said the only club he wil join in england iz LIVERPOOL. . .i think he should wait till the end of the season,n rafa might have the cash to sign hm with prince faisal arriving. Voronin can be added to the deal. :)"

Erm, I don't want Voronin, thanks. And that is so not a fair exchange. Plus, Liverpool can't afford Veeyah's weaker foot, never mind the complete package...

"Ferguson is forever smart. this is the ONLY perfect time to buy Villa. because the rest of the clubs have enough of scoring powers. who else is gonna buy Villa if you say Valencia are eager to sell now? That is exactly why the price is so low, but we can't trust this figure yet because it is most likely not right. but i'd say valencia won't be willing to sell Silva."

Valencia aren't willing to sell either, idiot. They just might not have a choice. Though if they do, you can bet your ass on the fact it won't be for a measly £40mil.

"seems that so many people don't understand the word 'cash strapped' and 'need to sell' they're like 'they're worth bla bla bla'.. well whatever theyr'e worth, they're at a disadvantage now, and only MANU have the resources to purchase them, since madrid is already mounted with debts.. hehehe.. now THATS my fergie"

Seems like THIS idiot doesn't understand that Valencia may be cash strapped and need to sell, but they're not going to let their two biggest stars go for a pathetic amount of money. They're cash strapped, not mentally retarded.

"i think the players realise they have gone the distance with Valencia and the club itself really needs to cash in and strengthen thier squad - its a shame tho"

Er, that would be why both have pledged their future to Valencia is it? You don't sign an extension to a contract to keep you at a club until 2014 if you want to leave the next year fucktard.

"I like Valencia as a club, dont get me wrong, but this two lads deserve tO win some medals and ManUnited is the write place for such a stuff. C,mon Villa and Silva, be smart and come to EUROPIAN CAPITAL OF TROPHYS"

Firstly, learn to fucking spell. Secondly, it's not that long ago Valencia were winning things. Thirdly, they're in it for the FOOTBALL not the money and trophies (though I'm sure the latter would be nice...) so they're not going to drop their morals for some shiny things.

"to all the loserfool fans who are sayin dream on mancs and stuff money isnt the only criteria good 4 u coz ur bankrupt in necase u need to sell players to buy so for those 2 to come u will have to sell gerrard and torres ha ha but ur forgtn 1 thing silva himself said he wants to join manutd!!!!!!!"

Silva said no such thing, asshole. He said he was flattered a club like Man Utd was interested in him. Doesn't quite translate into the same thing. Also, both guys have said they'd prefer to stay in Spain if they have to leave Valencia. Manchester is not in Spain. And I'm no idiot, I realise Liverpool isn't either. However, it's a damn sight closer than you're ever going to be.

"silva is the best with no doubt but villa is 28 and is not worth it,i guess aguero is the best option"

Just...LMAO at this entire statement. Being 28 (and he's actually still 27 buttwipe, get your facts right) does not mean you're not a good enough player. Dahveed Veeyah is currently one of the best strikers in the world, he has a phenomenal strike record and every single team wants him leading their front line. You only don't think he's worth it because you know you've got no chance of getting him. Reality bites.

"Look at all MU haters...hahah. No..No that can't be true. hahah. You scared? of course you are. You thought SAF was just going to sit on all that money. You know big signings were coming and yeah Chealse don't get your hopes up for the title. I believe the deal will be made for around 50 mil. Valencia is hurting and they don't want to sell to their competitors RM and Barca. Glory Glory..."

THIS is the exact reason I have an intense dislike of most Man Utd fans. Glory hunters are not proper football fans. Fact. There's not going to be a deal for £50mil because Valencia aren't stupid. They know how important these two are to the team. Secondly, I'm sure they'd rather sell to someone who will give a lot more money seeing as they're in 'dire financial straits'. Besides, RM and Barca, not exactly direct competition for Valencia right now. Try Sevilla, Villareal, Atletico etc...

"Thats what they are worth, what have they done in their careers? Won euro 08 and thats all, no c.l. or the competition in spain. They are not worth anything, besides villa now is 27. Valencia rejected 47 € from barca because the teams are in the same competition, u dont want to sell a player to your rivals, that would be bussines that hurts yourself, u cant compansate that with money... pep didnt fire eto because he is black either im sick of that"

They are not worth anything? I'm not even going to justify that with a response. Their pinky nails are worth more than all of you could ever dream of being asshole. Veeyah's one of the best strikers in the world. And just look at Valencia's creativity drop when Silva's not on the pitch. Now tell me they're not worth anything. It's not all about the winning all the time, you know.

There were some intelligent comments though. Lookie here:
"You manure fans can go ahead and feel happy at thinking that valencia will be a feeder club to you. Valencia are becoming a big club again. GO find your own damm talent."

"Valencia are 600 mill in debt,they sell villa and silva who they can get for what 70 mill at best? the debt will be around 500 and then what? You think people running valencia are stupid? The new stadium is building, CL qualification is certain this year, money from CL and new stadium will be flowing in and they will be fine. Selling villa and silva to finance debt and then how will goals score??? Manure fans think people running valencia are stupid."

And THIS? Best. Comment. Ever.
"Definitely true after all Valencia rejected a 50m Euro bid for Villa from Real Madrid over the summer. It only makes sense that they'd drop their price mid-season and throw their second best player into the deal as a sweetener. Wonderful, informative and above all responsible sports journalism."

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*sighs happily*

Ignoring the fact that practically the ENTIRE first team is sat in the stands observing against Barca due to various injuries, I'd like to direct your attention to Dahveed. If you don't recognise him instantly (and shame on you if this is the case, do I not obsess enough over him on this blog?!) he's the one in orange.

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LMAO

What is this bullshit?! No, really. What is it?

I don't even think I've got the energy to go into all the reasons this would be the WORST move in history. But I'll do it anyway. Hey, someone might read this, see I make sense and stop writing this crap every two weeks.

• Dahveed Veeyah has said time and time again, he wants to stay in Spain. I know us Liverpool fans like to think we're in Spain because of our large Spanish contingent, but I promise you, Liverpool is in England. Therefore outside his requested zone and making this transfer highly unlikely.
• The stingy American bastards that currently own Liverpool giving up €49 mil for a striker who is currently at his peak and probably won't play at this level for more than 2/3 years after this...yeah, not happening. Actually, the likelihood of them giving up €49mil for anybody is pretty damn low.
• Veeyah and Torres can't play together on a regular basis. They're both strikers that play better when they're up front alone, so playing together, one of the two would have to play off the main striker. And that's kind of Steven Gerrard's current position. While he's versatile enough to play wherever the manager tells him, just off the striker is probably his best position.
• Neither Veeyah or Torres would be happy with being a benchwarmer, so alternating them would kind of fail. If you have unhappy strikers, they don't perform and it would kind of be a waste of a total of €70mil or however much the two of them added up to.
  
• The EPL is so far from Veeyah's style of football, it's unreal. There's no way he'd be as successful as everybody thinks he'd be if he were to move to Liverpool. He does well in La Liga because he can play his way without getting seven shades of shit kicked out of him because he's too good and they can't handle him.
• Liverpool may well be able to afford buying him, but realistically, they're not going to keep up his wages etc for however long his contract would be. And you'd better believe that if he stops performing, they're not going to want to be paying him obscene amounts of money each week.
• Veeyah has signed with Valencia until 2014. And his buyout clause is some crazy shit. Liverpool cannot pay that. Nobody can. Except maybe Man City or Real Madrid, who can seemingly pay anything.
• And on top of all this, Veeyah has been leaving Valencia for the past 4 transfer windows at least if we're to believe what newspaper reports tell us. He's still there. That kind of says more than I could. End of discussion, case closed.
  

Now please, can we stop with the lolz? As much as I appreciate you people writing articles that make me giggle, it gets kind of old when you hear it week in, week out.

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Can I please be Nando?

I have totally not been keeping up with the blog of late, partly because of exams, partly because I'm lazy and partly because there's not really much football on. Anyhow, moment of the game last night (aside from the Nando hatrick and Dahveed scoring) was this:

I might do a proper report later, but don't hold your breath. My laziness knows no bounds.

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Om nom nom

That is all.

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ILY. ILYSFM Dahveed.

This guy is seriously amazing. After the past few weeks, I honestly thought he would leave, but no. He wants to stay and see out his contract even though Valencia didn't make the CL and he deserves CL football. I know I harp on about this all the time. I don't want him to leave. I really don't. However, he is a CL type player and he deserves to be playing in the top tier of European competition. If Valencia aren't too desperate for money and can afford to hang onto him for one more season, they should. But if they don't make the CL next year, then honestly, for the sake of his career, he should go. It'll break my heart to see him play against Valencia, so any other La Liga team would be hard to see him at. Especially when the only two realistic options are Real Madrid and Barcelona. I just have everything crossed that Valencia make it out of this mess with all their key players still at the club. The painful reality is that they will probably lose one or two players at least. I'm sure I'll come to terms with that eventually. Just not yet.

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I love him so

He pulls the best faces ever.

Seriously, I lol every time. I can't help it.

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Oh Dahveed.

Erm...*snorts back a laugh* BB, ILY, but what the hell are you wearing? Seriously.

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Here we go again...

Are these people seriously mentally retarded? Why are they still insisting THIS is even a possiblity? Just stop already. He doesn't want to leave Spain. Manchester is not in Spain. I'm sick of reading about it already.

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Yay, he's back!!

Not that I care that much. I mean, I didn't miss him like whoa these past few weeks when a stupid knee injury has been keeping him from playing for Valencia...

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Valencia thighs

I got sort of inspired by the Kickette TTO this week and decided to compile a list of all the drool worthy thighs in this squad. Yes, it took me a long time to narrow it down to just one pic per guy. And yes, it took all my will power not to include every single one of the boys. They really do have a good set of thighs. Anyway, enough talk. Step right this way for the evidence...

Joaquin

Baraja

Pablo

Fernandes

Mata

Silva

Viana

RENNIE!

Mori

Albiol

Carleto

Dahveed

Albelda

Alexis

And the very definition of Valencia thigh - Vicente

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I knew it!

He wouldn't let me down. Read this. You see the bit where they say he does not want to leave Spain? Yeah, tough luck City. You're outside of Spain. Give it up, money can't buy you love. Or Dahveed Veeyah.

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I will stop soon, I promise

Do. Not. Want.

I don't know how many times I need to say this before people start paying attention to me. It took me a good few weeks of bleating on about Vicente starting a game until he finally did. And even then, it was only because there were no other options available more than Unai wanting to play him. If I have to do the same for this, then I will. He can't leave. He musn't leave. It really is that simple. Screw the money, it won't help if you don't have your best player. And if it gets to the situation where you HAVE to sell him, please don't send him to Man City. They're an alright team. Being an 'alright team' is not good enough for him. He deserves to be playing for a team that'll be in the CL every year, not a team that's barely going to scrape a mid table finish. Yes, I realise Valencia are probably closer to the latter right now, but they have the potential to be great again. They would be great if it wasn't for the fucked up finances. And also, with all the billions Man City have, they can't afford to give a little more than €40million. And Valencia aren't going to ask for more than that? Are you shitting me people?

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AHAHAHA!

Seriously?? I have been laughing non stop about this since I got the google alert this morning. The mere notion of it is just...no. Seriously, think about it. Dahveed has scored something like 19 goals for them already. He IS Valencia atm, when he's not on the pitch, they fail in a big way lately. Hell, they fail when he IS there sometimes, because one man alone cannot do the job of 10 others. But the thought of him leaving...do.not.want. I know that he's the main player that can bring in the money, and I get that. But come on, I think you need him a lot more than you need the money Valencia. Especially if you're going to consider bringing in Voronin as a replacement. I know that sounds like a stupid statement considering the extent of their debts, but honestly, there is only so much the money they're going to get from selling him is going to do. And when that's gone, it's the same old mess all over again, only this time, they don't have someone of his class to pull them into at least mid table mediocrity. I want them to stay true to what they've said and only sell if they absolutely HAVE to.

Liverpool. Please do not agree to this. I am counting on you. Rafa B, I know Valencia means something to you. Keep their hopes alive, please do not make them have to play with Voronin up front. He may be a good player, but he didn't work at Liverpool and I doubt he'll work at Valencia. Just sell him to Hertha, he seems to be doing ok for himself there. God, if this is what I have to put up with from now, it is going to be a long and painful summer. I think I might just hibernate it away.

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Well, fuck

It has been confirmed. Dahveed is out for the next 2 weeks at least. Read the full article here. And yes, I know it is goal.com and they're not exactly what you'd call reliable, but it's on the Valencia site AND superdeporte, so yeah. I just couldn't be bothered to translate it.

This news is going to be a big blow to Valencia, who are suffering badly right now. They need their top goalscorer there to get the goals for them, or I just don't realistically see where they're coming from. On the one hand, it's sort of a good thing. It'll help the team realise they cannot be so Veeyah dependant. It'll give Vicente a chance to play.

On the other hand - he's their top goalscorer. They need him more than I care to admit. The fact he's not going to be there for 2 weeks to bail them out? It scares the shit out of me. They're in freefall right now, and Unai said they'd hit rock bottom already, that the only way to go from here was up. I don't think that was true. These next two weeks, the potential for Valencia to REALLY hit rock bottom is very much a possibility. They have a porous defence and nobody really lethal enough to finish teams off at the other end. I'm preparing myself for a lot tears and tantrums over the next 2 weeks.

It was just about the worst possible time for this injury to come about. I'm the kind of person that hates to see anyone injured at any time. But for a player THIS important to a team at a stage of the season where they really NEED to be winning every game they play and hoping those around them drop points in order to make the CL spots? Yeah, that's just heartbreaking.

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GUH!

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Rock, paper, scissors...

Now now boys, there's no need to fight. Seriously. I'll make time for both :P

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If you needed proof they're clearly in love...

Look at the way they are totally ignoring Joaquin. Poor guy. *pets him* He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. And this picture is exactly the reason the Davids HAVE to stay. One of them leaves, the other will mope. It's just not on. You can't get in the way of true love.

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The Valencia skillz train...

Because I clearly have nothing better to do with my time (no, I really don't need to revise for the exams I have coming up...) I decided to go on a video hunt on youtube to find my fave players showing serious skillz. Now, I was lucky enough to come across one that shows my four fave Valencia boys showing skillz so I figured I'd post it. I mean, we all know I love the Valencia attack force.

David Villa is possibly one of the best strikers in the world right now. He has a natural goal scoring instinct, he can score penalties, free kicks and goals from open play. It's not just his goals that are important though, he provides many assists, he holds the ball up well and he's generally a pain in defenders' backsides. When he's not there, it is sometimes difficult to see where the goals are going to come from. That's not taking anything away from the rest of the team, but he is one of those players who defenders see on the teamsheet and shit themselves.

David Silva is possibly one of the best left wingers in Spain right now. He scores goals, he tricks his way past defenders and he wins a lot of fouls. Add in the fact that he is also more than capable of holding his own in a fight, you've got the perfect ingredients for a winger. They are potentially the most abused players on the pitch because they are the most dangerous. He was one of the players of the tournament for Spain during the Euros, but didn't get as much recognition as the other stars. Still, for his first major tournament, the boy did good.

Joaquin is easily one of the best right wingers in Spain. Valencia look a poorer side when he's not in the team, bossing the right wing. Again, he not only provides assists (and lots of them I might add) but he's also known to score the odd goal too. He really should be part of the Spain NT. There's not many players who can do it better than him, and the right wing is somewhere that could do with a little help. Him and Sergio Ramos running up and down there? Yeah, I'd hate to be the defender having to deal with that...

And then...then we have Vicente. I don't even know where to begin with him. Before he got injured, he was the best left winger in Spain. Nobody came close. He had the speed, the agility, the skillz, just the whole package. He was a joy to watch. That's not to say anything has changed, he's still one of my favourite players. He still bosses the left wing when he plays. Injuries aside, he could have become the best left winger in the world, but he missed out on what were arguably his best years.

Renan is probably a good 60% of the reason Valencia had such a great start to the season. Last year, they were missing a class goalkeeper who could bail the defence out when they needed it. And as much as it pains me to admit, the Valencia defence does need bailing out a lot. He makes some absolutely impossible saves and the team looks a lot more solid at the back when he's in goal. They've conceded far fewer goals this year than they did last year with more or less the same defence.

There's not all that many videos of the defence. Probably because they're not a very skillful bunch. I mean, sure, they defend, but there's no trickery, no noticable skillz like the strikers and midfielders. Probably just as well. It won't do to have them screw everything up because they decide to try about 40 stepovers with a striker from the opposition snapping at their heels. For the most part, they do the job they're paid to do and stop the goals going in.

Coming up next...The Liverpool Skillz train.

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